I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Drunk is a universal language darling
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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