Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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