You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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