in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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