Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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