Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
