i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
