Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
