the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
we're chasing vodka with high fives
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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