i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
