third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
