conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize
