I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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