we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
my being single is dangerous.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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