What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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