My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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