You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
