Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
