Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
