Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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