Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
