yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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