YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
