butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Randomize
