so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize