Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
