The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
