Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
