we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
