btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
