google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
