Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
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