i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
