Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize