nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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