Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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