in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
