Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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