You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
