Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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