Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
