Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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