I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
