No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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