ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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