More tranny stories later!
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
