Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
