You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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