Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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