So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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